"My face is too sexy for you." - TehSlapHappy
Age 38, Male
Philadelphia, PA
Joined on 1/12/05
Posted by Timmy - December 5th, 2008
Well, the other post hit 100 comments, so I thought that it was time for me to put on some clothes, trim my mustache and give the bear a break.
Also, it's getting close to Christmas time, and we all know what that means - I'm leaving!
Every year, around mid-December until early-January, I leave Newgrounds.
Where do I go? Well, that's between me, God and 15 hookers.
Merry Christmas, everyone!
And this an AWESOME video:
40 Inspirational Speeches in 2 Minutes
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SANTA SMELLS FUNNY D:
Ho Ho Hooooo-I crapped my pants
When did you get the sex change :(
Me and Rig both got ours at the same time - a two-for-one deal!
Half of those hookers half to be male, you know, to even the orgy out.
You are assuming that they aren't all male. :D
UNCENSOR YOU FACE OR THE REST OF US WILL BE COMPLETELY CONVINCED THAT YOU'RE CHIN-CHAN!
What the hell is a chin-chan?
And how about I just waggle my penis at you instead?
I've been naughty ;)
I guess you get coal this year...
(coal = raped)
I think I'm in love with you. Take me with you.
Where we're going, we won't need pants!
Am i the only one who got reminded of HoboPorn?
That is a dark period of my life...
Oh Santa you know how to cheer me up.
For $5 I can cheer you up all night long!
That'd be lovely, yes.
Also, <a href="http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Chin-Chan">http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/
Chin-Chan</a>
But...where did her chin go?
I was going to vote for you to be best poster, but I decided not since because you are a very inconsiderate person. If you aren't going to be nice to me than you might as well not be nice to anyone. Good day to you sir.
But but but but but but I sexed you up so you would vote fer me!!! D:
Aww... You're too kind. ;{)
Honestly, I'm just trying to get into your pants...
You are the best sexer upper, I apologize for those things I said about you. You are not inconsiderate. I hope you accept my apology ;)
Lets just put this all behind us and go back to sleep. Goodnight, honey.
Good night, :3
*snnnnnooorre*
i wants to play parcheesi too
The only type of Parcheesi I play is Strip Parcheesi! :D
I'd fuck you any day, Timmy.
Well have your people call my people, and we'll set up an appointment!
Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich
First, you must spread a thick layer of peanut butter onto the white part of a slice of bread. You can only spread the peanut butter on the white part, and the white part only. You may only spread peanut butter on one side. Spreading peanut butter on both sides will provide an inferior sandwich. Next, you must spread a thick layer of jelly onto the white part of a slice of bread. You can only spread the jelly on the white part, and the white part only. You may only spread jelly on one side. Spreading jelly on both sides will provide an inferior sandwich. You cannot spread jelly onto the same slice of bread onto which you have spread peanut butter. Also, you cannot spread peanut butter or jelly onto more than one slice of bread, as this will provide an undesired excess of either ingredient. Additionally, only peanut butter and jelly can be spread onto these slices of bread; no other ingredient will suffice, and no substitute can be used in a sandwich that is to be legitimately recognized as a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Likewise, only bread may be the substance upon which the peanut butter and jelly are spread, as anything else does not fit the standards of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich; if the peanut butter and jelly are spread onto a culinary medium that isn't bread, the meal at hand simply is not a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Once you have accomplished spreading a thin layer of peanut butter onto the white of one side of one slice of bread, and likewise has been accomplished using grape jelly on a separate slice of bread, you must match the slices of bread up to each other, forming a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. In this scenario, the peanut butter-covered face of bread must be facing the jelly-covered face of the second slice of bread so that the peanut butter surface touched the surface of the jelly. The surface of the peanut butter is not allowed to touch a jelly-less substance of bread, resulting in the jelly facing outwards, and likewise applies to the jelly. If a substance is found facing on the outside of the sandwich, the product will not be accepted as a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. The side with peanut butter and the side with jelly on it must match up and stick together to form one solid sandwich. When the eater picks up the sandwich, he or she must hold both pieces of bread at the same time, or else one slice will fall off, and eating only one slice of bread will not be recognized as the same or even similar to eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Next, you must take a bite of the sandwich. This action will consist of moving the sandwich within such a close proximity of your face that a small "bite" of the sandwich will enter your mouth for you to mash up with your teeth. This bite must be a bite that includes both slices of bread, peanut butter and jelly. Make sure that all obstructions are clear from the mouth and esophagus, not including peanut butter, jelly or bread or any combination of said ingredients. If you have followed all previous steps, this goal will be easily accomplished. Not doing so will create an incorrect and inferior dining experience and thus will not be a peanut and butter sandwich that is being eaten. However, if one successfully gets both peanut butter and jelly in one bite that fits in the mouth and does not result in choking, the dining experience is thus far acceptable. For your complete experience with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich to be considered complete and unobjectable, you must perform the previously mentioned series of taking bites of the sandwich, chewing them, and swallowing them repeatedly until the entire sandwich has been removed visible existence. These circumstances may only be reached by eating the entire sandwich, and no parts of the sandwich may be thrown away or given to somebody else. This is your sandwich, and your responsibility. For the Dining experience to be completed, the sandwich must be completely digested, but then my mom got scared, and said, "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air." I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo, holmes to Bel-Air!" I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo holmes smell ya later!" Looked at my kingdom I was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.
You sorta lost it there at the end, I see...
*Cries*
Don't Leave. You Can't Leave Me!!
I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL!!!
*Cries More*
NO!!! You can not leave. i will not let you!
*Loads Shotgun*
See? This is why I try to NOT rape clingy people...it always ends in heartbreak.
And shotgun blasts.
I got booted from the chat again. For my Music. i don't understand i was playing Zeppelin?!?!
Once you become known as spammy, its hard to shake that reputation, even if you don't spam anymore.
Who kicked you, anyway?
jw, what law school do you go to? :3
School of Hard Cocks
ngfan14
I'm one of those hookers.
Timmy
I'll see you soon then!
(money's on the table)